lightninginabottle

        [It's snowing tonight.]        It's winter again, and she probably already knows it. But what she doesn't know is how I would pay too much attention to the way the thin gold chain necklace her mother made her wear dips between her protruding collarbones and the way she fiddles with the hem of her skirt because I know she hates the way her knees look. And with the winter comes everything else.        It's that time of year again when everything comes flooding back. It always happens the same way: it's the way the trees cast shadows that seem darker than they were before, and the cold and breathless sunlight that rekindle that frant

i knew we were unraveling. i'd always noticed the kinks and imperfections in the fabric but never said anything. never said anything about the loose ends that were being pulled apart; the patchwork that needed resewing and the buttons that needed refastening. but neither did you. so I took my needle and thread and tried to fix it. i would sit quietly alone with my tools, trying cross-stitch, chain stitch, running stitch, anything, to mend this cloth. but because i was clumsy; because i fumbled with the needles, i'd always prick my finger; the cloth now stained vermillion, and i'd have to stop and wash it off. countless bandages covered

i keep dreaming of her and the ocean. and how her legs blend into the sand and begin to wash away, and how the water pools in the dent of her collarbone and trickles down her neck and flows back to the sea. how everything returns and nothing can stay. and my eyes sting because i'm crying saltwater because the moon won't let me keep her. he keeps reaching out, ripping at her skin. pulling her in and washing her back for only a short while, white and cold, but the constellations on her back and shoulders are still bright. she keeps reaching up, grasping at something beyond her skeleton fingers. 'i can't remember what it's called.' her voic

        i suffer from a disease with symptoms such as weak knees, scarlet cheeks, broken hearts, and waiting outside the school gate to walk home with a girl who doesn’t like me the way i want her to.        she’s the farthest star that i can never reach, the gut wrenching stomachache i have every night before i go to sleep, and the incessant tap tap tapping in my chest that i can't seem to quiet no matter how hard i try.        and i never notice how ill i am until i look in the bathroom mirror and see the bite marks on my lips that kept them from trembling and feel my heart wince at the sight of her face outside the school gat

        i’d often find you in the graveyard behind your house, sitting atop of tombstones swinging your black converses back and forth and throwing your pretty head back to smile at those who weren’t there. i’d watch you, ever curious as to why you would talk to those who don’t answer.         ‘dead don’t speak. they listen. who better to talk to?’ is what you’d say to me.         i didn’t understand. but on sweltering nights when i couldn’t get to sleep because the only th

        Tell me have you seen this girl? This red haired, cat eyed girl with snowy skin kissed with freckles and pretty pink lips that I think about much more than I should.                  Tell me have you seen this girl? This girl who sits in narrow alleyways and draws crooked hearts on the chipped walls with the eyeliner and red lipstick she likes to keep in her pocket to make her feel pretty.         Tell me have you seen this girl? This girl who sprints barefoot down the hot p

hey, hey        remember when we were little and we’d scatter glass marbles across the playground concrete and play for keepsies. i was so upset the day you won my cat eyes that i wouldn’t speak to you. but you were too cute to stay mad at. plus i won your oxblood. hey, hey        remember when we accidentally broke mrs. mellans window with a baseball. you grabbed my hand and led me into the garden, shielding me from mrs. mellan’s yelling like they were arrows. my face matched the poppies, and i was afraid the black eyed susans could see. hey, hey        remember when you told me you liked girls with long blonde hair an

you're such a heartbreaker you blonde haired blue eyed boy when i see you, my chest softens and begins to slowly drip like a forgotten popsicle and plummets into my stomach no to me, you're a heart melter